14/1/2011

5:00pm

I just tried calling home, but the operator said that they can't place collect calls to Australia. I told myself I wouldn't cry, but it was just a kick in the gut that made me realise just how far away I am to everything and everyone back home.

I guess they define homesickness as a kind of culture shock. I didn't feel it as much in Heredia because I was still fairly connected to home, and in a fairly urbanised and comparatively familiar place.

I also underestimated the time period. It feels like such a long time, but I've only been in Costa Rica for about 10 days. I don't even want to try counting how many I have left to go. I'm reminded of the way my sister always says two weeks is enough time for her for a holiday, and that after that time she gets of anything but her own bed. I always considered myself a lot more adventurous, willing to be gone for long periods of time. Now I'm discovering that's not quite the case.

I listen to some of the others talking about their travel plans, and how they want to go all over the world, and are gone for months at a time. I guess I'm not as much of a traveller. Not to say I'm not adventurous; I just learnt this past year that, where I come from, I can have all kinds of crazy adventures without even leaving the city. It's probably a lot cheaper too...

But if I have to be honest, there is mainly one reason (or one person) why I think, or know, that I feel so homesick. I told myself for months that I didn't want to get romantically involved with anyone before leaving for 5 weeks. Yet almost as though fate was trying to spite me, I meet the most amazing guy on Christmas night, and have an awesome week with him, only to have to up and leave. I know people would say it's just a week, and that I shouldn't miss him that much, but I feel the opposite. In that cute, 'getting to know you' phase in any new interest, all you want to do is spend every possible second with that person. And at that point I felt like I would have given up this trip just to keep seeing him.

But I know that would be really stupid. I spend the better part of a year looking forward to this trip, and I'm trying to view this trip as a progressive adventure, rather than counting down the days.

But then I remember back to New Years Eve, where he told his friends he wasn't feeling well, just so he could jump in a cab and pay nearly $100 to surprise me at my party and be there for the midnight kiss... it was like something out of a movie.

And it's moments like that, it's hard to not wish I was getting on that plane in LA.